How are you doing? I've been studying hard and learning lots in school as well as in my God who provides with perfect timing and His abundant love for all.
I got re-baptized on 11/11/11! It was a spur of the moment thing. I was at someone's house because Gavi (a little girl who calls me Sissy:]) was getting baptized. Before we went outside to do the baptism, the wife of the household offered a chance for anyone who wanted to be baptized to do so. I felt God telling me, "Look, it's a great opportunity to rededicate yourself to me. Plus, the view is amazing!" Hahaha! I couldn't help but feel convicted, because of so much growth, change and life I have experienced in the past few months, learning and listening to God speak, and the difficulties I encountered and suffered in relationship this past summer as well. I have been healing from this relationship due to my Lord's overwhelming love and compassion for me, having given me a spirit, "...not of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7 Nothing else drives me to live more than Holy Spirit, who encourages me, Jesus Christ, who has, "...set me as a seal upon [His] heart, as a seal upon [His] arm; For love is as strong as death, Jealousy as cruel as the grave... Many waters cannot quench love." Song of Solomon 8:6-7. I know it is strong, because when Israel turned from God, He spoke to Ezekiel, telling him, "...I was crushed by their adulterous hearts which had departed from Me,..." Ezekiel 6:9. How tender is Love?! "If God is for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:31. I cannot comprehend this kind of love, and yet I long to feel and express this sort of love to my God as well as to others. This past week in my single life workshop I am in, I realized that I am afraid to love fully, at the capacity that God created me to love. I have always thought my brothers in Christ are great, but I'm realizing that I was holding back the friendship from them that I have always desired to express, but worried that I would give the wrong impression. I have been freed of that negative pressure, and I am practicing loving on them in a healthy way that allows me to be even more true to myself than I have been in the past.
Ok..... Off the rabbit trail. Later on that same day, I went to Twin View, a satellite campus of Bethel, because Bethel was hosting a 48-hr prayer and worship time. Memories of worship back in elementary school flooded my mind. I wondered ifI could become worn out from worship (I danced/soaked/sang for 4hours that night; the next few days my legs would literally cramp when I walked, especially down stairs haha), but I realized that I can't get enough of it because I get refreshment from glorifying God and get filled up by the Holy Spirit. My heart danced with joy at this revelation.
So, I am a new creation, all over again! The spirit is still alive in me, and I have rededicated my life after 11 years (the last time being in a pool when my church was called River Rock.) I have been exploring, learning and enjoying fellowship here at Simpson University with my roommates, friends, and even one of my teachers. And it has been amazing!
Today, my friend Emily and I were on our way to the cafeteria today for dinner, and we stopped on the path because there was a bunch of fallen leaves. I started pushing them into a small pile, which turned into a huge pile that we both worked on and eventually jumped in. I enjoyed it.
Just felt like sharing this significant little bit with you. :]
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