What Are You Waiting For?

Today, I went to a mini-retreat with some girls from my school.  The woman who hosted the event gave us french toast with strawberries (oh, how I do love strawberries!), time to talk in pairs in order to share our struggles with each other and to encourage one another in prayer, and then gave us time to work on a craft: making a cover for a notepad! It was  extremely wonderful, being in a room of young women who I know, that were free to love on each other and express their own creativity God has blessed us each with. Here are the pictures of the front, back, and inside of the cover.

Front cover

Back cover

Inside cover/note pad

Sitting on the tables where we ate and worked were gift bags. And inside the bags, including gum, fruit leather (yum!) and other little goodies, was a book titled What Are You Waiting For? by Dannah Gresh. At first I found it odd that we would be given such a book- the subtitle says "The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex"- but then I was suuuuper grateful to receive such a gift. I have found it rare to hear about the importance of healthy sexuality, even from the Church body, sadly, and also difficulties to live it out in this post-modern and humanistic society I live in. Dannah isn't afraid to cut to the chase and tell all about why waiting is good with Biblical research she has done personally, what makes it such a struggle, and how to practically battle for a thing called purity.
This afternoon, I sat down with God and we have currently read through the first seven and a half chapters together :] I enjoyed stopping after reading a sentence that struck a chord in me, and meditating on it with Holy Spirit. Or reading a statement that was confusing, and asking Papa for clarification. It has made clear things that were foggy in my mind, and reaffirmed many truths I was already aware of.  So, I recommend this book to all single women (and to single men, too :] )

The part in the book where I stopped, meditated, and got drunk on Holy Spirit's revelation :]

One part of the book that I want to share talks about Genesis 4:1 when it says, "Adam lay with his wife Eve, and she became pregnant and gave birth to Cain." The the Hebrew word used for "lay" (cause we all know he wasn't just lying there) is "yada", which literally means "To know, to be known, to be deeply respected."  And I realized, I deeply desire to be known. Not just in the physical, but even more so emotionally and mentally. I want my husband to know my favorite flower and randomly give me a bouquet of them, to know to order a side of chili instead of coleslaw as a side for me if I'm in the bathroom when the waiter is taking orders for my food, and other things that make me unique and set me apart from all other women in his eyes.  The cool thing about all this, is knowing that he will. I know he won't be perfect 100% of the time, but  he will pretty darn good at knowing me intimately. My favorite thing about being known, is that I am aware that God already knows me, and loved me so deeply, even before the day of my creation, to prepare for me everything that I have or will ever need in my life, as well as give me gifts that He knows I would enjoy, just to make my heart smile and my countenance light up.

And so the Author of Romance continues to draw me in relationship, being the supreme example of Love. <3 It's good stuff, peeps!

Accounting and Missions- Quite the Combo

One thing you may or may not know about me [but now you do] is that I am an accounting major. Woot! haha
Yes, my goal is to become a CPA. I do not know if that is what my career will be for my entire life, because I do expect to take time off to raise my beautiful children when they come along, but for now, that is the plan.

Today, my accounting professor drove two classmates and myself down to Sacramento for a student luncheon.  It was hosted by CalCPA, and it gave some time for us to network with different accounting firms as well as a very good meal and a wonderful day off campus. :] It was a wonderful experience, and I hope more people go next year.

This evening, a few hours after I got back to campus, I was interviewed by two lovely people who are taking several students to Peru on a missions trip this coming Spring Break! I am starting to get more and more excited about it, and I don't even know if I will be accepted to go. There are only 12 spots, and more than 12 people applied.  I'm definitely praying for God's will. If I I do get the opportunity to go, then I will be able to love on orphaned kids who live in garbage dumps, and also help build a house that a church is currently working on!! How sweet is that!? I want to bless them so much, and I am already praying for the darlings. If I don't get to go, then I am thinking about applying to another missionary program that plants churches around the world, and I could pick wherever I want to go, and either help with the church planting or help in some business building. I really would love to help underdeveloped countries through business!!!

So, yeah.  Story of my heart right now.  Laters :D

One one one one.... etc.

How are you doing? I've been studying hard and learning lots in school as well as in my God who provides with perfect timing and His abundant love for all.

I got re-baptized on 11/11/11! It was a spur of the moment thing. I was at someone's house because Gavi (a little girl who calls me Sissy:]) was getting baptized. Before we went outside to do the baptism, the wife of the household offered a chance for anyone who wanted to be baptized to do so. I felt God telling me, "Look, it's a great opportunity to rededicate yourself to me. Plus, the view is amazing!" Hahaha! I couldn't help but feel convicted, because of so much growth, change and life I have experienced in the past few months, learning and listening to God speak, and the difficulties I encountered and suffered in relationship this past summer as well.  I have been healing from this relationship due to my Lord's overwhelming love and compassion for me, having given me a spirit,  "...not of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7 Nothing else drives me to live more than Holy Spirit, who encourages me, Jesus Christ, who has,  "...set me as a seal upon [His] heart, as a seal upon [His] arm; For love is as strong as death, Jealousy as cruel as the grave...  Many waters cannot quench love." Song of Solomon 8:6-7.  I know it is strong, because when Israel turned from God, He spoke to Ezekiel, telling him, "...I was crushed by their adulterous hearts which had departed from Me,..." Ezekiel 6:9. How tender is Love?! "If God is for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:31. I cannot comprehend this kind of love, and yet I long to feel and express this sort of love to my God as well as to others. This past week in my single life workshop I am in, I realized that I am afraid to love fully, at the capacity that God created me to love.  I have always thought my brothers in Christ are great, but I'm realizing that I was holding back the friendship from them that I have always desired to express, but worried that I would give the wrong impression.  I have been freed of that negative pressure, and I am practicing loving on them in a healthy way that allows me to be even more true to myself than I have been in the past.

Ok..... Off the rabbit trail. Later on that same day, I went to Twin View, a satellite campus of Bethel, because Bethel was hosting a 48-hr prayer and worship time. Memories of worship back in elementary school flooded my mind. I wondered ifI could become worn out from worship (I danced/soaked/sang for 4hours that night; the next few days my legs would literally cramp when I walked, especially down stairs haha), but I realized that I can't get enough of it because I get refreshment from glorifying God and get filled up by the Holy Spirit. My heart danced with joy at this revelation.

 So, I am a new creation, all over again! The spirit is still alive in me, and I have rededicated my life after 11 years (the last time being in a pool when my church was called River Rock.) I have been exploring, learning and enjoying fellowship here at Simpson University with my roommates, friends, and even one of my teachers. And it has been amazing!


Today, my friend Emily and I were on our way to the cafeteria today for dinner, and we stopped on the path because there was a bunch of fallen leaves.  I started pushing them into a small pile, which turned into a huge pile that we both worked on and eventually jumped in. I enjoyed it.




Just felt like sharing this significant little bit with you.  :]

Jesus

So.  I love Jesus.   He is wonderful, growing me in ways that blow my mind.
My roommate Eva read this poem to me, and it helped me feel so much better about myself. That it's okay to grow into a magnificent oak tree, even if I leave others "behind". Cause I'm not leaving them; they are growing in a different way than I am.

The Oak and The Rose
by Shel Silverstein 
An oak tree and a rosebush grew,
Young and green together,
Talking the talk of growing things-
Wind and water and weather. 
And while the rosebush sweetly bloomed
The oak tree grew so high
That now it spoke of newer things-
Eagles, mountain peaks and sky.
"I guess you think you're pretty great,"
The rose was heard to cry, 
Screaming as loud as it possibly could 
To the treetop in the sky.
"And you have no time for flower talk,
Now that you've grown so tall."
"It's no so much that I've grow," said the tree,
"It's just that you've stayed so small."

Snow!!!

So I woke up early this morning for my eight o'clock class, and it was cloudy slash rainy. I groggily walked to the cafeteria for breakfast, gearing up to start the day, despite the fact that I was running late.  After eating, I swiftly exit, zipping up to weather the cold environment outside. To my delight, there were snow clumps falling merrily as I lifted my face to the sky. While the clock tower stuck eight, I jumped after large chunks with my mouth, and the cool burst of water was so refreshing that I was distracted for several seconds before I remembered that I needed to be in class.  Skipping and sliding through the slush I went joyfully :D

Since then, I have been in six snowball fights [because the snow is sticking-YAY!!!] had a foot cramp in my right food due to snow getting in my rain boot, eaten snow from the sky, made a huuuuuuge heart in the snow on one of the several lawns on campus, and have seen several snow men and one snow family.  What a wonderful life!!

This is me heading to class :]

And to think, just last week felt like May and there are pink and white blossoms on several trees now, all of which are holding the fresh snow. How delightful! :D

Revived

        Tonight, about thirty students met in our small chapel room on campus.  We worshiped our Lord, prayed for one another and shared healing and life testimonies from some of the group.  It was wonderful- I felt completely in my element.  The Holy Spirit moves in magnificent ways when we make room for it to do so. :]  I am so at peace, because God's love fulfills my every need over and over and over again.  He is all-powerful, letting me know that I can do anything when He gives me strength to do so.  Yay Jesus!!!

        Yesterday I gave a speech to be class president next year in front of the whole school... very intimidating.  I couldn't sleep very well the night before- I woke up four times! /:  Right before it all started, three of my friends came up to me and prayed for peace on my mind.  It sure worked, because when I was up on stage giving my speech and answering questions I wasn't scared, just a little jittery when answering questions that I didn't know were going to be asked of me.  I'm giving this up to God- I don't know if I will get it or not, but He'll definitely use me one way or another next year. :]

          I can feel God's blessing on me, that He's cheering me on saying, "You can do it!!" as I step out of my comfort zone and allow God to use me in areas I previously thought were not for me.  I'm learning that I don't need to start a revival here on campus either; Jesus is living in me, and I am the revival whenever I spread His authority and joy over people I see in my daily life.  He is filling me up and I'm so willing to pour out His Spirit to others who are thirsty. :]

New Cut For A New Year

    I am now back at Simpson. What a strange feeling.  I haven't seen too many people here yet, and two of my room mates are not here yet.
    Two days ago, I got my hair cut. My hair is in the mail to Locks of Love :]
    Yesterday I saw my mom off as she went to board her airplane.  I was very sad to see her go- I was just getting used to being with her and my family the past few weeks, and then I have to leave them again.   :'(
   I was able to spend my weekend at the Garcia's house with my mom, which was very nice.  Gavrielle is my eight-year-old sissy and we got to play together a lot.  I took her to school this morning, which was very strange for me because I am not used to driving before eight o'clock in the morning.  We saw the sun rising up near Mount Lassen as we speed in the freezing weather towards Bethel Church. 
   I have a great view of what is to come this next semester. I know it will be great! :D